I am very happy to announce that my new website is up and running at www.suepeasebanitt.com. My blog will be moving soon to this new website complete with archives of this one. There are upcoming events, coaching and past life regression services , radio interviews and more! I look forward to seeing you there.
Happy 2013!
Susan Pease Banitt, LCSW
Showing posts with label The Trauma Tool Kit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Trauma Tool Kit. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
The Power of Persistence (or What you Resist, Persists)
I don’t know how to say this to you any other way so I’m just going to say it: There is no easy way to heal from psychological trauma.
There is no pill, no elixir, no magic wand, no therapist, no book, no workshop, no yoga class, no blogger that will give you a quick fix from your suffering. I’m sorry; I truly am.
If you want to heal from PTSD you are going to have to work very hard for a long time. You are going to have to spend money (probably a lot of money relative to your income) to get help to overcome what you feel should have never happened to you. And then you will have to work some more.
In my book I compare the journey of healing PTSD to the journey that Frodo takes in The Lord of the Rings trilogy to cast the evil, all powerful ring back into it’s source: a dangerous volcano hidden inside of an even more dangerous enemy territory governed by an all seeing magical evil sorcerer. Frodo has two choices. He can either stay in his comfort zone in the bucolic shire of his childhood and live in denial until his land is ultimately overrun with evil mutant elves and destroyed while the ring has corrupted him (or someone else) completely. Or, he can man up and take the journey, one that is most perilous and with no guarantee of success and try to destroy the thing forever.
This is basically our choice as well. Is the journey so easy? If it were, everyone would make it.
Yes, I know it sucks. But suck it up folks. That is the way it is. I can only say this to you, not because I am cruel and heartless, but because this is a journey that I’ve taken. I’ve done the dirt time, so to speak, in spades.
It is totally worth it. The sooner you get over resistance to healing and begin, the better. Healing PTSD takes a chunk of your life. Not healing from PTSD takes your entire life (and possibly future lifetimes if you believe in that sort of thing).
Take a moment and review the pros and cons of healing:
Pros Cons
Peace of mind Nightmares and flashbacks for the rest of your life, chronic anxiety
The ability to love and be loved Failed relationships; people who are afraid of you; persistent loneliness
Bodily health Heart disease, migraines, joint pain, digestive issues, auto immune diseases
Wisdom Ignorance, bitterness, confusion
Compassion for self and others Self-pity, entitlement, self-loathing, shame
Money well spent in healing Money ill spent in addictions, diversions and distractions
Well, you get the picture.
So which will it be? Healing PTSD does have an endpoint. It brings gifts beyond
compare but only if you finish the job. You have no more time to lose. Put this at the top
of your New Year’s Resolutions and you will ring in a much brighter 2014.
Blessings on your journey of healing!
Endurance is the most difficult of all the disciplines but it is to the one who endures that
the final victory comes. ~ Buddha
Friday, November 30, 2012
Sandy Update 3: Top Five Reasons You're Eligible to Apply for SBA Disaster Assistance | SBA.gov
Sandy Update 3: Top Five Reasons You're Eligible to Apply for SBA Disaster Assistance | SBA.gov
If you have property destruction from Sandy, please read this very important article. You don't have to be a business owner or to have insurance to apply for a low interest loan from the Small Business Administration. You might also be able to apply even if you live in a Coastal Barrier Zone. Most loans are made at four percent! The remainder are at six percent. Read the article for complete details.
If you have property destruction from Sandy, please read this very important article. You don't have to be a business owner or to have insurance to apply for a low interest loan from the Small Business Administration. You might also be able to apply even if you live in a Coastal Barrier Zone. Most loans are made at four percent! The remainder are at six percent. Read the article for complete details.
Monday, November 26, 2012
PTSD and the Holiday Season
Here’s the sad truth. PTSD often worsens during the holiday season. One would hope it was different, that holiday cheer, food, friends and good spirit would pop up like champagne on one of those commercials we see on TV where people are toasting each other, smiling and all looking fit, young and strong. But alas, it is not and here are some reasons why:
1) Holidays come with lots of triggers. We can be around too many people or too few. Even if we want to be with people, loneliness can be enhanced by the inability to connect in the midst of deep emotions such as fear, grief, or rage. There is no lonely like the lonely that comes in the midst of a group of friends or family.
2) We tend to eat foods that aggravate our nervous system. PTSD causes an inflammatory reaction in the body (see my HPA Axis posts). When we pile on the sugar, alcohol, fatty foods and just plain junk that pervades holiday fare our delicate and taxed nervous system can come under a lot of strain. Eating aggravates our anxiety, and anxiety aggravates our eating, repeating until New Year’s Resolutions come.
3) Feelings of self-loathing tend to emerge more strongly in holiday season. Perhaps we are trying to live up to an unattainable ideal of our religious faith or maybe proximity to family reminds us of our (and their) shortcomings. Whatever the reason, the phenomenon is real.
4) There is a lot of stimuli in the environment! Bright lights, flashing lights, loud music, smells, endless holiday music, crowded shopping environments all add to the load on the nervous system. Not to mention traveling on overcrowded airplanes and roads in dangerous weather. Not exactly a good environment for the hypervigilant and stressed.
If you think avoiding the holidays is easy, just watch the hilarious movie, Christmas with the Kranks. A lucky few might escape to Hawaii or a cruise but even then the holidays follow and are on our mind (if not our neighbors).
So, what to do? If you see a therapist and can afford it, scheduling extra sessions can be helpful. For those of us not lucky enough to have that resource, protection from the holiday barrage starts with our own awareness.
Pace yourself. Take some time every day to see what it is you do and don’t want to do. Say ‘no’ as often as you must. Stop worrying about hurting other people’s feelings, and focus on healing your own. Remind yourself that this, too, shall pass. For it will.
Better yet, dig down in yourself to find your own meaning of the holiday – whether it is about religion, vacation, or promoting your business, find the meaning that will be best for you.
Move into alignment with the season. In Chinese philosophy, winter is a time to move inside, to become dormant like the plants outside, resting so that our roots will be nourished and the plant flourish in the Spring. This is my favorite meaning of the winter holidays: renewal, self-nourishment, quiet companionship with those you love, sleep. Lots of sleep.
So here is my wish for you in the holiday and end of year time: Know when you are triggered and move to take care of yourself as needed. Cultivate compassion in your heart for yourself and others. Rest. Eat well. (And read The Trauma Tool Kit as needed.)
Happy Holidays.
1) Holidays come with lots of triggers. We can be around too many people or too few. Even if we want to be with people, loneliness can be enhanced by the inability to connect in the midst of deep emotions such as fear, grief, or rage. There is no lonely like the lonely that comes in the midst of a group of friends or family.
2) We tend to eat foods that aggravate our nervous system. PTSD causes an inflammatory reaction in the body (see my HPA Axis posts). When we pile on the sugar, alcohol, fatty foods and just plain junk that pervades holiday fare our delicate and taxed nervous system can come under a lot of strain. Eating aggravates our anxiety, and anxiety aggravates our eating, repeating until New Year’s Resolutions come.
3) Feelings of self-loathing tend to emerge more strongly in holiday season. Perhaps we are trying to live up to an unattainable ideal of our religious faith or maybe proximity to family reminds us of our (and their) shortcomings. Whatever the reason, the phenomenon is real.
4) There is a lot of stimuli in the environment! Bright lights, flashing lights, loud music, smells, endless holiday music, crowded shopping environments all add to the load on the nervous system. Not to mention traveling on overcrowded airplanes and roads in dangerous weather. Not exactly a good environment for the hypervigilant and stressed.
If you think avoiding the holidays is easy, just watch the hilarious movie, Christmas with the Kranks. A lucky few might escape to Hawaii or a cruise but even then the holidays follow and are on our mind (if not our neighbors).
So, what to do? If you see a therapist and can afford it, scheduling extra sessions can be helpful. For those of us not lucky enough to have that resource, protection from the holiday barrage starts with our own awareness.
Pace yourself. Take some time every day to see what it is you do and don’t want to do. Say ‘no’ as often as you must. Stop worrying about hurting other people’s feelings, and focus on healing your own. Remind yourself that this, too, shall pass. For it will.
Better yet, dig down in yourself to find your own meaning of the holiday – whether it is about religion, vacation, or promoting your business, find the meaning that will be best for you.
Move into alignment with the season. In Chinese philosophy, winter is a time to move inside, to become dormant like the plants outside, resting so that our roots will be nourished and the plant flourish in the Spring. This is my favorite meaning of the winter holidays: renewal, self-nourishment, quiet companionship with those you love, sleep. Lots of sleep.
So here is my wish for you in the holiday and end of year time: Know when you are triggered and move to take care of yourself as needed. Cultivate compassion in your heart for yourself and others. Rest. Eat well. (And read The Trauma Tool Kit as needed.)
Happy Holidays.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Research is in: Meditation works!
The good folks at Mass General Hospital (MGH), Boston University and other research institutions have shown conclusively in a research setting, for the first time, that an 8-week meditation program affected brain function in a positive way even when the subjects were not meditating. The amygdala (our crisis response center) was positively affected by their modest practice. Highly recommended reading!(Click on the title to go right to the article.)
Monday, October 29, 2012
Hurricane Sandy: Ten Tips to Help You Weather the Storm
Sandy is a big unsexy monster ready to pound the East Coast. Here are some tips for surviving the storm and its aftermath.
1) Don’t be afraid to get help! This is no time for pride. NGO’s and government assistance programs exist to help people in need. Helping in emergencies is a core function of government (and your taxes) and, indeed, a mark of a civilized society. If you wait too long to get help you may end up inconveniencing and/or endangering yourself, those around you or those who can help you. It’s really OK. We all need assistance some time in our lives. Maybe it’s your turn.
2) FEMA is a great resource. Many states along the Mid-Atlantic and the East Coast have shelters open in response to Hurricane Sandy. Search for an open shelter by texting SHELTER + a zip code to 43362 (4FEMA). You can also download the FEMA disaster app for the device of your choosing here: http://apps.usa.gov/fema-mobile.shtml.
3) RED CROSS (NGO) is over 130 years old and helps approximately 70,000 people a year survive and thrive after disasters. Be prepared: From your mobile phone, call "**REDCROSS" (**73327677) and they will send you a link to download the app to your phone or you can download them directly from the iTunes or Google Play app stores. If you don’t need them, great. But if you do, you will have their information at the ready! Use them; you can always make a donation later.
4) Know where your local homeless shelter is. Up and down the East Coast homeless shelters have been expanding services. If your home or apartment becomes unlivable during the storm, go there! Here is a link for all the homeless shelters in the state of New York: http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/newyork.html
5) Find a church. Any church. Whether you are a believer or not. Churches have been gearing up for this storm for days. They don’t care about the state of your belief or non-belief. They just want to help. Let them.
6) Make sure you stay on any and all medications! If you run out or something happens, get more at your local Emergency Room. When I worked on the no-name storm (aka Perfect Storm) one of the biggest problems was people who had lost or gone off of their medication. You can become disoriented and ill quickly going off some medications suddenly. Set timers and be sure you stay on schedule! Time gets wonky when there is a big storm or emergency happening. If you have to evacuate suddenly, make your medications a priority in packing!
7) Keep yourself busy and happy. Storms bring unexpected bonuses in terms of companionship, comraderie, time off, clearing of pollution, quiet, relief from inane media, and neighborliness. In the no-name storm, people who ventured out onto the beach after the storm found hundreds of flash-frozen lobsters ready for the picking!
8) Check on your neighbors – especially those who are infirm, elderly or who have children. You might become somebody’s patron saint!
9) Don’t do work beyond your capacity (be a foolish hero). There is an abundance of emergency workers on call for power outages, health emergencies, etc. Let them do their work as professionals. You do them the biggest favor by staying out of their way and keeping yourself safe.
10) Don’t panic over material goods. There are many resources available to help you build your life and home back after the storm. One of these is the Small Business Administration. According to their website: “The SBA provides low interest disaster loans to homeowners, renters businesses of all sizes and private, nonprofit organizations to repair or replace real estate, personal property, machinery & equipment, inventory and business assets that have been damaged or destroyed in a declared disaster." http://www.sba.gov/category/navigation-structure/loans-grants/small-business-loans/disaster-loans
1) Don’t be afraid to get help! This is no time for pride. NGO’s and government assistance programs exist to help people in need. Helping in emergencies is a core function of government (and your taxes) and, indeed, a mark of a civilized society. If you wait too long to get help you may end up inconveniencing and/or endangering yourself, those around you or those who can help you. It’s really OK. We all need assistance some time in our lives. Maybe it’s your turn.
2) FEMA is a great resource. Many states along the Mid-Atlantic and the East Coast have shelters open in response to Hurricane Sandy. Search for an open shelter by texting SHELTER + a zip code to 43362 (4FEMA). You can also download the FEMA disaster app for the device of your choosing here: http://apps.usa.gov/fema-mobile.shtml.
3) RED CROSS (NGO) is over 130 years old and helps approximately 70,000 people a year survive and thrive after disasters. Be prepared: From your mobile phone, call "**REDCROSS" (**73327677) and they will send you a link to download the app to your phone or you can download them directly from the iTunes or Google Play app stores. If you don’t need them, great. But if you do, you will have their information at the ready! Use them; you can always make a donation later.
4) Know where your local homeless shelter is. Up and down the East Coast homeless shelters have been expanding services. If your home or apartment becomes unlivable during the storm, go there! Here is a link for all the homeless shelters in the state of New York: http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/newyork.html
5) Find a church. Any church. Whether you are a believer or not. Churches have been gearing up for this storm for days. They don’t care about the state of your belief or non-belief. They just want to help. Let them.
6) Make sure you stay on any and all medications! If you run out or something happens, get more at your local Emergency Room. When I worked on the no-name storm (aka Perfect Storm) one of the biggest problems was people who had lost or gone off of their medication. You can become disoriented and ill quickly going off some medications suddenly. Set timers and be sure you stay on schedule! Time gets wonky when there is a big storm or emergency happening. If you have to evacuate suddenly, make your medications a priority in packing!
7) Keep yourself busy and happy. Storms bring unexpected bonuses in terms of companionship, comraderie, time off, clearing of pollution, quiet, relief from inane media, and neighborliness. In the no-name storm, people who ventured out onto the beach after the storm found hundreds of flash-frozen lobsters ready for the picking!
8) Check on your neighbors – especially those who are infirm, elderly or who have children. You might become somebody’s patron saint!
9) Don’t do work beyond your capacity (be a foolish hero). There is an abundance of emergency workers on call for power outages, health emergencies, etc. Let them do their work as professionals. You do them the biggest favor by staying out of their way and keeping yourself safe.
10) Don’t panic over material goods. There are many resources available to help you build your life and home back after the storm. One of these is the Small Business Administration. According to their website: “The SBA provides low interest disaster loans to homeowners, renters businesses of all sizes and private, nonprofit organizations to repair or replace real estate, personal property, machinery & equipment, inventory and business assets that have been damaged or destroyed in a declared disaster." http://www.sba.gov/category/navigation-structure/loans-grants/small-business-loans/disaster-loans
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Halloween: A Tough Season for Ritual Abuse Survivors
Ritual Abuse. Yes, it’s real. Yes, I know there are many of you white knuckling your way through October. Hang on!
For an unfortunate but larger than you might think number of Americans, Halloween is a time that activates ritual abuse memories and/or programming.
I know nobody talks about this. Therapists have been running scared since the sham lawsuits and harassment of the last two decades by the now discredited False Memory Foundation.
But I’m here to tell you , it’s real. And I feel for all of you who have been hurt in this fashion.
Ritual Abuse (RA) survivors have a unique set of triggers. Because so many are abused in rituals around Halloween (Satanic and Witchcraft ceremonial time) these triggers can get very activating. In some cases, there may be programming to return to the cult for ceremony. These internally installed prompts may be conscious or, more likely, unconscious especially for those who are still under cult control and connection.
If you think you may be a ritual abuse survivor, you may want to check out this page of Ellen Lacter, Ph.D.’s comprehensive RA survivor website, endritualabuse.org.
If you know you are, here are some reminders:
~ know that Halloween programming and compulsions will pass right after the “holiday”
~ surround yourself with safe friends
~ plan to make extra appointments with your therapist
~ go on a media fast until the end of the month
~ take extra good care of yourself and your “littles” this month
~ affirm your own inherent spirituality unrelated to any rituals
Know that there are many of us out here wishing you safety, healing and freedom. Take good care of yourself!
For an unfortunate but larger than you might think number of Americans, Halloween is a time that activates ritual abuse memories and/or programming.
I know nobody talks about this. Therapists have been running scared since the sham lawsuits and harassment of the last two decades by the now discredited False Memory Foundation.
But I’m here to tell you , it’s real. And I feel for all of you who have been hurt in this fashion.
Ritual Abuse (RA) survivors have a unique set of triggers. Because so many are abused in rituals around Halloween (Satanic and Witchcraft ceremonial time) these triggers can get very activating. In some cases, there may be programming to return to the cult for ceremony. These internally installed prompts may be conscious or, more likely, unconscious especially for those who are still under cult control and connection.
If you think you may be a ritual abuse survivor, you may want to check out this page of Ellen Lacter, Ph.D.’s comprehensive RA survivor website, endritualabuse.org.
If you know you are, here are some reminders:
~ know that Halloween programming and compulsions will pass right after the “holiday”
~ surround yourself with safe friends
~ plan to make extra appointments with your therapist
~ go on a media fast until the end of the month
~ take extra good care of yourself and your “littles” this month
~ affirm your own inherent spirituality unrelated to any rituals
Know that there are many of us out here wishing you safety, healing and freedom. Take good care of yourself!
Monday, October 8, 2012
ACE (Adverse Childhood Events): The Most Important Trauma Study You’ve Never Heard About
In order to understand why his obesity patients were dropping out of a successful weight loss program, Dr. Vincent Felitti dived into their medical records and interviews for clues. What he found launched a several year study that has enrolled more than 17,000 people. These patients were talking about incest, abuse and neglect, extreme adversity in their childhoods.
The Centers for Disease Control and Dr. Felitti with Kaiser Permanente launched a study to look at adverse childhood events and their effect on health and longevity over the lifespan.
What is an adverse childhood event? For the purposes of the study it is:
- sexual abuse
- physical abuse
- emotional abuse
- physical neglect
- emotional neglect
- a home where the mother was treated violently
- substance abuse in the home
- mental illness in the home
- parental separation or divorce
- one or more parents imprisoned
Count up the categories that apply to you. That gives you your ACE score. Anything above 4 predisposes people to substance abuse, dysfunction and health issues among other things. People with the highest scores died on average 20 years earlier than people with low ACE scores. (For more information about the mechanisms of these effects see my earlier blog posts on the HPA Axis.)
You can check out more information about the study here. Highly recommended reading for everyone: those of us who suffered difficult childhoods, caregivers, treaters and public policy setters.
This can feel overwhelming as we delve into the truth. The good news is that we are beginning to finally come to terms with the widespread effects of trauma and PTSD and the need to heal from it!
Monday, September 24, 2012
Saturday, August 25, 2012
Exciting News!
The Trauma Tool Kit is now available in ebook digital format here: http://questbooks-ebookstore.net/Books/9780835640541/af7456b1-7638-4421-942d-9a735be208f5 It is good for androids, iphones, ipads, computers, Nooks and more. (I'll let you know when it comes to Amazon).
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